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« on: February 17, 2012, 12:08:39 PM »
When I was really young, I had a close friend whose parents rented an extra room to a weird old lady from somewhere in South America. She would spy on us, and when she caught us up to no good, she would rat us out, usually to the neighbors or my friend's folks. One afternoon, before playing a prank (probably on little dickhead who lived next door), I peaked into her window to make sure she was busy... and she was. I saw her pulling a large bucket out from under the bed. Intrigued, I called my bud up to watch, who propped himself up on the spigot for the hose. To our horror, she lifted her dress, stood over the bucket, and took a gnarly crap. The sight of nasty old lady pubes, the sound of her out-of-breath relief, and the realization that she kept a bucket of shit underneath her bed terrified my bud so much that he lost his balance and turned on the hose, which was connected to a sprinkler. Hearing the commotion, she quickly turned her head and we made deer-in-the-headlights eye contact (she was still on the bucket holding up her dress). I took off running. Never did figure out why she preferred shitting in a bucket; when I can't sleep, I lie awake wondering.
Lately, I've noticed that one stall at school is always covered in T.P. At first, I thought it was typical public bathroom toilet paper antics, but later I realized it's some kid who covers up all the cracks in the stall doors so that nobody could see inside. Not gross, but pretty weird.
Also, I have another friend who avoids shitting in public restrooms at all costs. Turns out he had some kind of OCD where he has to get completely naked before he takes a shit. I guess it's really inconvenient/embarrassing/gross to take off all your clothes in the stall of a busy restroom. Pretty sure there was something about taking a shower afterwards, too...
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