Messages

106

Non-Music Shit / Re: ABUSIVE_HUSBAND = WORST COOK IN AMERICA?

« on: November 18, 2009, 04:29:47 PM »

When does this debut? I want to set my DVR. This is so much cooler than my stint on Remote Control 20 years ago. Mostly because it's NOW!

107

Cities / Re: SAN FRAN VACATION

« on: November 17, 2009, 02:25:54 PM »

You need to get a churro relleno (I recommend cajeta) with an ice cream chaser from Cinco De Mayo. If the Tepache man is there with his Rascal, that would be the perfect aperitif.

I took a single sip of Fernet once and was horrified. It tasted like Stevie Nicks' attic. Never again.

108

Non-Music Shit / Re: New Curb season

« on: November 16, 2009, 02:21:52 PM »

"P.S. Your cunt is in the sink"- Marty Funkhouser

109

Non-Music Shit / Re: Ken Ober : DEAD

« on: November 16, 2009, 02:12:20 PM »

Holy shit, you were on Remote Control?! And you won!?

You are now the coolest guy on Termbo (sorry STEVE or wnkrs or whoever).

I was on the show in 1989. They had this thing called "Remote Control: Out of the Basement Tour," where the entire cast traveled around the US and did the show live at colleges. I auditioned for that deal at my college and made the cut. I then won the college show. As the winner, I got to go to NY to be a contestant on the real show. And then I won that.

As far as game shows go, it was VERY low-budget. I was in NYC for less than 24 hours for the whole deal. The studio was in Harlem back when Harlem was still Harlem. The only food provided was pizza and there wasn't much of it. I was kind of bummed I got the Acapulco trip, rather than the car they sometimes offered. I could've used a Geo Metro.

My parents are still trying to find the VHS copy of the episode I was on. I had really long hair, I weighed about 145 lbs., and was wearing these enormous Sally Jessy Rafael-esque glasses. If I ever get the tape, it's going on Youtube.

110

Non-Music Shit / Re: Ken Ober : DEAD

« on: November 16, 2009, 01:56:47 PM »

We're gonna need to hear from Hugh Ass  ASAP on this.

Ober was a total coked-out (I assumed) aggro putz when I was a contestant on Remote Control. He didn't have anything but threats for the contestants. "If any of you guys say "fuck" during taping, I'm gonna be VERY pissed!" Sandler, Dennis Leary, Colin Quin and the pre-Carrie Wuhrer blonde hostess were all totally nice to the us. Quinn and Sandler even hung out and ate pizza with us. Leary gave me a high-five backstage after I won the grand prize, a trip to Acapulco.

111

Non-Music Shit / Re: Food you love that other people think is weird?

« on: November 12, 2009, 12:36:18 PM »

tuna or hot dogs in mac and cheese is not weird

some of this shit is gross though, PINEAPPLE AND CHEDDAR

gah

Putting tuna in anything hot makes me feel ill just to think about it.  My ex-wife made me a tuna casserole once. That was the only time in my life that I remember not finishing a meal.

I'd totally eat pineapple in mac and cheese, though.

112

Non-Music Shit / Re: Food you love that other people think is weird?

« on: November 12, 2009, 12:06:21 PM »

Buche.

Also a lot of people think eating fruit with hot sauce is weird until they try it. There is nothing more refreshing on a hot day then a big bowl of watermelon with lime juice and hot sauce (or hot chili pepper) on it.

113

Non-Music Shit / Re: Happy Birthday Icki!!!!

« on: November 09, 2009, 12:56:23 PM »

Happy birthday, Mark. Did you taste a subtle burger-y flavor when you were eating the White Castle cake? It would've made a perfect accompaniment for Mitch's White Castle-role.

114

Non-Music Shit / Re: Larry David & Michael Richards in 1981

« on: October 30, 2009, 03:13:50 PM »

This 1980 Fridays bit isn't as funny now as when I was studying for my Bar Mitzvah, but it's not without merit. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smERiPdFMag

115

Non-Music Shit / Re: NAME MY MOTHERFUCKING FOOD CART

« on: October 27, 2009, 04:51:50 PM »

The Pork Swordsman

116

Non-Music Shit / Re: wisdom teeth

« on: October 26, 2009, 09:51:21 AM »

I had my wisdom teeth out with only a local anaesthetic and it took like 5 minutes for the whole procedure. It really depends on how grown in they are and whether they're impacted. If they're pretty much exposed and not too crooked, they can pull them out 1-2-3. I had one tooth that they had to crack to remove (with a nutcracker-type device), but the other 3 came out like they were nothing. I didn't even need painkillers after mine were out and I was eating solid foods the next day. I wouldn't worry until you know how fucked up yours are.

117

Music Shit / Re: why are movie soundtracks so lame?

« on: October 26, 2009, 08:46:55 AM »

The Saturday Night Fever soundtrack is awesome. Every song was placed perfectly within the film. I bought it on 8-track with my allowance. I've spent hours contemplating which version of "More Than a Woman" is better. Is it the Bee Gees version or Tavares' version?

I also really like the Grace of My Heart soundtrack.

118

Non-Music Shit / Re: Jail

« on: October 23, 2009, 02:46:08 PM »

I've only been in jail once- for 28 hours. I was a political prisoner at age 18! Back in my anarcho-peace punk days- May 1986- I went to the big anarchist gathering in Chicago that commemorated the 100th anniversary of the Haymarket Massacre. During the annual May Day parade, several of the anarchos broke off and started rioting on Michigan Ave. They smashed some windows, spray painted some stuff, and turned over newspaper vending machines. I didn't do anything other than carry a banner and shout goofy slogans, but the cops started rounding up anybody they could find who was part of the anarchist contingent.

Luckily, all of the anarchy people were locked up together. The guys in general population were screaming at us, though, and that terrified me. And the Chicago cops were total dicks. "You call that a riot? You should've been here in '68!" One kid in there with us was a minor, who happened to have burned a flag during the riot. According to the kid, the cops blindfolded him, took him into another cell, put a gun to his head, and pulled the trigger. It wasn't loaded, but the kid cried like a baby and shit himself. They also didn't allow a diabetic guy to get his insulin. Apparently, both the kid and the diabetic had rich families and they got hotshot attorneys who successfully sued the City of Chicago for pretty decent settlements.

My girlfriend at the time was locked up with the women, who did get mixed in with the "regular" criminals. The anarch-ettes didn't get strip searched, but they had to watch the junkies and whores get searched right in front of them. My girlfriend saw them search a woman and they pulled out an entire pack of cigarettes (hard pack) from her cooch!

They didn't feed us until about 20 hours into the ordeal, but almost everybody was vegan, so we wouldn't eat the bologna sandwiches they gave us. Not eating for 28 hours was like hell on earth for me. Other than that, the worst part of the incarceration was having to pee and poo in a toilet in front of 8 guys sitting 3 feet away from me. The best part was singing songs at the top of our lungs. You've never heard "Do They Owe Us a Living" until you've heard it a capella with jailhouse acoustics. One of the guys in there (Greg from famous SF anarchy band @ State of Mind) sang Springsteen's "Nebraska," which was the first time I'd heard those songs. I bought the LP as soon as they let me out of the joint.

Everybody was let out on $50 bail, paid by some fund the organizers had established. I had a court date a month later, but couldn't attend because I lived 6 hours away in Iowa. This was a shame, because everybody that showed up had the charges dropped. Because of this, I had/have a bench warrant over my head in Illinois. So, I'm always careful when I go there. Somebody told me that the statute of limitations ran out after 7 years, but I'm not sure about that. Anybody know for sure?

119

Non-Music Shit / Re: Quit Drinking

« on: October 20, 2009, 12:34:38 PM »

i would be much more well-liked

Would your yoga-ing improve?

120

Non-Music Shit / Re: Quit Drinking

« on: October 20, 2009, 12:27:38 PM »

I'm old as shit and have been drunk maybe 5 times in my life. I have a beer here and there, but it really doesn't mean much to me at all.

However, pretty much everybody in "the scene" talks about drinking and/or taking various drugs almost as much as they talk about music. I don't know how these people could stop drinking (or even ease up on their drinking) and still retain their identities. It seems as if so much of who they are is tied up in their boozing. If they stopped drinking, it would be like they started listening to Dave Matthews Band. It would be the same as if my life stopped revolving around the quest for binge-eating cheap food. Who would I be if I stopped doing that?

Who would you be if you stopped drinking? I'm not being sarcastic. I really want to know.