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« on: January 03, 2014, 01:24:06 AM »
This is a list of records that I really like this year. It does not include records that I like this year. It does not include tapes (many of which were exceptional and better than many records). It does not include retrospectives or reissues. It does not include other records that I have not heard. It does not include anything that I have released because that is pompous and stupid. So I have decided to make pompous and stupid remarks about other records that other people have released. Sorry to interrupt the Devo (Everyone should already know that Devo rules) thread.
Parasite - Proof Of Existence 7": A Japanese Metal Band making Japanese Metal Music for Japanese Metal People all over the world white web.
Gary Wrong Group/Wizzard Sleeve - Halloween Violence 7": Both Band(s) deliver the best tracks of each band(s) career. A complete gut-buster and a perfect Halloween dish.
Sad Boys - Cry Now Cry Later... 7": I don't really care for how most people describe this band. File under: Quality.
Good Throb - Culture Vulture 7″: Every time this band releases a record, I want to quit making any form of music. Good Throb will just accidentally do it better. By a long shot.
Quango - Fatality 7": Read above. How do you make the perfect 2013 punk song by reading the newspaper? By reading the newspaper.
ARCHAIC - Noise In Your Head 7" The description Paco gave is spot on and I don't even own this record yet. Boys are in the band.
Obliteration - War Is Our Destiny 7": I feel like this band just got mad at me. I've done something wrong and it's time to pay. I like to listen to the drums.
DiE - DiE 7": I was really excited when I heard this record, because at the time I really wanted to hear it. I didn't even know that. Then I bought it. Then I listened to it.
Lumpy and the Dumpers - Sex Pit 7": Flip it. Then flip it again. Then flip it again. If Nekrofilth were less metal and more punk this would be their Gemini counter part. Thanks, guys.
True Sons Of Thunder - Black Astrologers 7": You went and made a song about Neil Degrasse Tyson. It was the best song anyone has ever made about Neil Degrasse Tyson.
Buck Biloxi/Giorgio Murderer 7": Shithole Boys might be my favorite Buck tune. They are all good. They are all bad. THEME FROM STAR TREK
His Electro Blue Voice - Ruthless Sperm LP: My favorite record this year. Of course I begged to put a full length out years ago. They did it now. On Sub Pop. I'm glad to have ever even worked with these designers of noise perfection. The biggest complaint I hear about this band is that they sing in English and that distracts from the appeal. I find it to compliment their disjointed approach to rhythmic song writing.
Angkor Wrack - Puma Punkur LP: Did you ever want to commit suicide? Me either.
Satanic Rockers - Fu Kung LP: This album gets better each time I listen to it. I feel like I'm in the dryer and need more time to dry. The B-side puts more quarters in the machine.
Church Whip - Psychedelic Nightmare LP: People got mad at this band. It was pretty stupid.
Cuntz - Solid Mates LP: The best joke I've heard in awhile, even though I've heard this one before.
The Floor Above - Bishop LP: Maybe I hear White Load, or maybe I hear the modern incarnation of Raspberry Bulbs if they made demos and cared less(or more?). I don't know the dude doing this, but I agree.
The Repos - Live Munitions LP: The only record I purchased on Record Store day. Possibly the best record by these guys. I guess.
Sky Ferreira - Night Time, My Time LP: Semi-interesting girl makes pop album that makes me feel like the male counterpart in a lesbian relationship or like the guy that wears ladies underwear and puts make-up on in front of the mirror in private. Puts own emaciated tit on cover. Way to go.
Pissed Jeans - Honeys LP: Not as immediately filling as King Of Jeans, a highly overlooked and excellent follow-up that's even weirder?
Bad Noids - Everything From Soup To Dessert LP: These guys are funny. They make me laugh. They make me laugh when I listen to them. They make me laugh when I see them. They make me laugh when I don't. They are better than your band and you laugh at them. They don't care.
Nomad - 自殺 12": It took me awhile to get into this. Then I put it on again.
Kremlin - Drunk in the Gulag 12": Thanks, Ivan.
The Sleaze - Tecktonik Girlz 12": These children of indie rock tried to make indie rock music I think and accidentally made great songs because they were so inept. I heard at Horrible Fest from some other children that went to school with them that they were just a bunch of trust fund assholes. For some reason it made me like them even more. Live Wire is such a terrible song.
Raspberry Bulbs - Deformed Worship LP: Even though everything they've ever done is far more interesting to me, this album is still really good. I get so bored with it that I put it on again.
Iceage - You're Nothing LP: This thing kills their first record and it's just long enough to make sense. Everyone loves to hate them. Especially live. They are better live. They are terrible live.
The Secret Prostitutes - Welcome To Punk, Viva La Evolucion, We Can Do Whatever We Want LP: There is a bunch of stuff on this record that I don't even like. That's part of what makes it so great. The last song is the best.
Liqour Store - In the Garden LP: Maybe the best Arena Rock Band that the States have going for it. The best Arena Rock Band that the States have going for it.
Rajayttajat - Awlopbopaloopop Alopbam Raja LP: I don't care who you are, if you don't like this band you don't like Rock n' Roll. You are an idiot. You have no brains or sense of humor. You are an asshole. You do not know how to have fun. You have never listened to good music in your life. You are a complete piece of shit. You have never listened to Little Richard. I don't like you because you are a prick. You are a prick that has no business pretending to be a prick. That's what I would say if I was a total prick pretending to be a prick. This record is the best. It makes me happy. I'm allowed to say that because the Bat Shit version of the record hasn't come out yet. Sorry. Fuck on.
Darkthrone - The Underground Resistance LP: Thank god Darkthrone knows how to make metal albums that are really funny. How do they do that?
Nekrofilth - Devil's Breath LP: Not quite as essential as their Worship Destruction 12", but still better than most everything else in the metal/punk crossover bullshit. A complete meal. Mealworm. The best live show I saw this year.
Shitfucker - Sucks Cocks in Hell LP: This album stays on my turntable whenever I put it on. You've heard all of the riffs before, but the sloppy transitions and and perfect production just makes it easy to listen to over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. They've never done anything wrong. They suck cocks in hell.
Majeure - Romance Language 12": Everyone who knows anything about me knows that I let John Carpenter and Jean Michel Jarre do lines off of my boner. It's a hard life.
Favorite Reissue: Wicked Witch - Chaos 1978-1986 LP: So many good reissues came out this year. I bought them all. I bought so many that I couldn't even buy them all. Who is that? Whatever, you are going to pay too much for it anyway. Sorry that you didn't like it. This record was probably played more than anything else in my home this year. This guy was a genius. Funky, Silly, Psychedelic as fuck, beat happy bullshit that must have been way too weird for even the weirdest funkholes of the time. I guess I don't know why you wouldn't listen to this.
2014 is going to be just fine too.
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